Sermon for twenty-third Sunday after Pentecost (Tokyo, Osaka)
According to the will of God, the father possesses the authority in the family and therefore has the entire responsibility before God and man for his family.
Fr Peter Fortin, FSSPX
“Lord, my daughter has just now died: but come and lay your hand upon her, and she will return to life.”
In this instance in the gospel the life of child is lost and there is chaos and disorder in the home and all seems lost. Misery and discouragement that the child is lost. Imagine the father feeling as if he failed, it’s his fault for the death of the child. He conceived the child and she is lost and appears dead in all the noise of those crying. We don’t read that the man is widower, so we assume the wife or mother is alive and most probably there. It is most commendable, the ruler goes to Our Lord, worships Him and asks Him to come and Our Lord responds and goes immediately. Our Lord says that she is not dead but asleep. The people there are worldly and disrespectful to Our Lord. They are against Him, against Christ in the home of this ruler. Our Lord comes to restore order and gets rid of the worldly people and noise and then He raises the girl by her hand and restores her to the father. We can take this scene and draw much fruit for families, homes and fathers. Our Lord no doubt admired this Ruler as He did many who exhibited great faith. The man makes a request and invitation to Christ and not turned away.
For more than 100 years, the spirit of the world is set to corrupt and destroy Christian society wholly and entirely. In order to do so, they have attacked the Christian family. From that moment, the Faith and the Christian spirit have been disappearing and many souls lost. The family, since 1960’s especially, has been the subject of attack, in married life as well as in the upbringing and education of children. This is why divorce or separations are rampant, and the children are disconnected from parents and as a result disconnected from God. Divorce, contraception, pornography, loss of prayer, ineffective sacramental life have ravaged the family life, it has stifled any growth and the introduction of homosexual unions is the death knell for any sort of future family life possible in society.
What can be done? What can be proposed to rectify this situation? We must resist the modern trend. Archbishop Marcel Lefebvre insisted that to form saintly priests there must first be saintly families, It is a strict duty which each home must make its own to form holy families: to form a family that is united and virtuous, bringing forth good fruit before God and man. A family is likened to a tree. The children are the fruit. A good tree brings forth good fruit and a bad tree, bad fruit. How to make the tree a good tree? A successful Catholic family is one from which the good God can draw forth holy vocations. It is necessary to often to have this thought in mind, and this from the early years until the maturity of the souls entrusted to you.
One must sanctify oneself, as well as one’s spouse, by means of life in common and by the reception of the sacraments. Sanctity is expected of each and everyone. More so for those who have others to depend on them. “Be perfect as My heavenly Father is perfect.” St. Peter writes “be as children in obedience trust in grace for it is written: “You shall be holy, for I am holy”. In order to be holy and bring others to holiness, it is necessary to practice well the duty of state.
According to the will of God, the father possesses the authority in the family and therefore has the entire responsibility before God and man for his family. This is by nature as Adam is the father of humanity. To share in the paternity of God, to produce souls in the image and likeness of God destined to be with Him in heaven for eternity. There are many beautiful examples of what it is to be a man, to be a husband, to be a father in Sacred Scripture but especially in St. Joseph and Our Lord Jesus Christ. We might ask yes of course St. Joseph but why Our Lord? It is He because He is a perfect Son, a perfect reflection of the Father in Heaven. He is the ideal. One might say that the world hates fatherhood because it is an image of God and His Fatherhood for all.
Wherever there is authority there are duties and responsibilities. The Role of the Father is most important for restoration of Society. With it is linked the Fatherhood of a priesthood. Without good Fathers, there cannot be priests. So in order to reinforce the role of the father in the family, I will propose a few qualities that a father must have and also the disorders that should be noted.
Here are a few qualities that a father must possess.
Benefactor – One who means well to all under his care and who will guide and protect and keep order in the home. He must be most approachable always to assist any with their difficulties.
Accountability - The Father of a family must remember that his authority is delegated to him and that therefore he will one day have to render an account of his management. The father of a family is a steward. The family, father himself, wife, children – all belong to God. The Father has grave responsibility to lead all to Him.
Obedience and Submission to God “The head of all men is Christ” (I Cor. 11:3). Everyone must submit their will to God’s. Most especially the Father as his decisions and actions will affect the entire life of the family for good or bad. How to follow God’s will and His Spirit? It is found with catechism and the sacraments and recourse to the priests. This reference to the Church is willed by God. It can also reassure the wife and the children, and they will know that the decisions are not arbitrary.
Prayer – He must pray for guidance and the holiness of his family. For the souls entrusted to him. What would it be if the souls entrusted to his care are provided for materially only and then lost for eternity. This idea that the father is the one who calls to prayers and takes the initiative in religious ceremonies is even found with the pagans. Prayers, offered together brings order into the home especially if initiated by the father.
Harmony - First and foremost, he must have harmony with God and His Church and secondarily His Wife and children. There is a great importance to live in harmony with his spouse. Without harmony, his efforts will bear little or no fruit. In order to have harmony in the home, it is necessary: to have good communication, unity, admiration, and to be a peacemaker.
For Communication: It is important to speak always to the spouse about projects and the cares of the family. The husband must receive suggestions from and will explain his objectives, bearing always in mind the principle at stake.
In regards to Unity: Mother and Father must share the same spirit in such a way that neither spouse complains against the other especially in front of the children, and that the children thus sense the unity of the parents. Of course, it is up to the husband to make the ultimate decision and to implement the practical means to its realization.
Admiration: The husband must easily praise his wife for her collaboration and good initiatives. By valuing his wife, then, the husband will assure himself of a precious and devoted help. He will leave to his wife a great latitude in the domain that is hers inside the home.
Peacemaker: He must reflect the image of Our Lord. This is why he must handle family conflicts in a calm and just manner. This is a special grace and it even has a special reward – blessed are the peacemakers- for they shall be called children of God. Correction is not an easy task! However, putting order and getting rid of bad habits with kindness and firmness avoids greater conflicts. Cowardice and impatience in corrections make matters far worse. They can be the occasion of coldness, oppositions, and yelling – all sorts of trouble.
Disorders that lead to grave dangers:
The following disorders affect all domains of family life: lack of a schedule, disorder in the house, extended time on phone or internet, a spirit of criticism and of mockery, immodesty in speech, action and dress, dangerous friendships, and idleness.
The father is naturally a leader and must not only pretend to be a good leader but really, he must have qualities and want the good of everyone in the home. He must first lead in prayer, reception of the sacraments, practice of virtue and avoidance of vice. Not only for himself but every member of the family. Nothing can replace a good example of the father. It is necessary that the children see these virtues embodied in the parents in order to practice them in the future.
Let us summarize the qualities of the head of the family which favor obedience from all in family:
Goodness - God the Father is characterized by goodness, a benefactor who will first give good spirit to the family. Such is the primary quality of the head of a family. Goodness allows for those members of the family to open up. Goodness and kindness are not signs of weakness, but of understanding and care for the good of each.
Prudence - The father of a family will regularly practice the virtue of prudence. This virtue consists in looking for good solutions but with mother as well.
Sacrifice A father must sacrifice his selfishness, his comfort zone, and his own interests for his wife and family. “Husbands, love your spouses as Christ also loved the Church” (Eph. 5:25). We know how much Christ loved the Church, to the point of sacrificing Himself for her, even to allowing His Sacred Heart to be pierced.
The father must sacrifice himself. Not pretend. But be the good man expected. The father will take care to remain worthy of the respect of his wife so that she will be proud of him. His work and accomplishments, his attitudes, and of his qualities.
The father must kind and firm. The child must sense that his father loves him and that he does not just favor the child’s wants but truly desires his good. The father must be vigilant and always available for mother and the children.
Let us take a look at the consequences of the faults of the father of the family.
Harshness - If the father is harsh and rough in his authority, not knowing when to listen to his spouse or to his children, he will instill a spirit of questioning and of rebellion. This will cultivate much doubt and distrust in the home. This spirit can destroy the home and lead the loss of faith in the children.
Weakness - If the father is on the other hand, weak making no demands and fleeing responsibility. The wife will attempt to supplement but it will always be lacking. The mother by nature cannot fulfill the role of the father. More often than not if the father shirks responsibility, the sons will lack character, strength of soul, and a sense of responsibility.
Lack of Organization - If the father does not know how to organize, to command precisely, he will always be unhappy because nothing will get done, or what is done will not be done well.
Scandal – Kills the spiritual life of the family. He will lead the souls entrusted to his care to perdition.
Let us look to the ruler in the Gospel. Perform what is expected. Be the one to put things in orders. In all difficulties, trials and struggles have the same reaction as the ruler. Make contact with Christ. You find Christ here. Confess your faith, worship Him, gain His friendship through the sacrament of confession and then bring Him into the Home. You do this by receiving Him in Holy Communion. He will live inside and guide your actions. By doing this it is as if bringing Christ to those members of the family that is sick or dead spiritually. By allowing Him to live in you, then your will becomes his, your actions become his. What is the first thing that our Lord does, “Leave”. These people ridiculed Our Lord. He banishes the worldly spirit, included are all the bad influences and then He touches the child and the home is restored. Our Lord comes to put order, peace, harmony and happiness in the home.
According to the will of God, the father possesses the authority in the family and therefore has the entire responsibility before God and man for his family.
Fr Peter Fortin, FSSPX
“Lord, my daughter has just now died: but come and lay your hand upon her, and she will return to life.”
In this instance in the gospel the life of child is lost and there is chaos and disorder in the home and all seems lost. Misery and discouragement that the child is lost. Imagine the father feeling as if he failed, it’s his fault for the death of the child. He conceived the child and she is lost and appears dead in all the noise of those crying. We don’t read that the man is widower, so we assume the wife or mother is alive and most probably there. It is most commendable, the ruler goes to Our Lord, worships Him and asks Him to come and Our Lord responds and goes immediately. Our Lord says that she is not dead but asleep. The people there are worldly and disrespectful to Our Lord. They are against Him, against Christ in the home of this ruler. Our Lord comes to restore order and gets rid of the worldly people and noise and then He raises the girl by her hand and restores her to the father. We can take this scene and draw much fruit for families, homes and fathers. Our Lord no doubt admired this Ruler as He did many who exhibited great faith. The man makes a request and invitation to Christ and not turned away.
For more than 100 years, the spirit of the world is set to corrupt and destroy Christian society wholly and entirely. In order to do so, they have attacked the Christian family. From that moment, the Faith and the Christian spirit have been disappearing and many souls lost. The family, since 1960’s especially, has been the subject of attack, in married life as well as in the upbringing and education of children. This is why divorce or separations are rampant, and the children are disconnected from parents and as a result disconnected from God. Divorce, contraception, pornography, loss of prayer, ineffective sacramental life have ravaged the family life, it has stifled any growth and the introduction of homosexual unions is the death knell for any sort of future family life possible in society.
What can be done? What can be proposed to rectify this situation? We must resist the modern trend. Archbishop Marcel Lefebvre insisted that to form saintly priests there must first be saintly families, It is a strict duty which each home must make its own to form holy families: to form a family that is united and virtuous, bringing forth good fruit before God and man. A family is likened to a tree. The children are the fruit. A good tree brings forth good fruit and a bad tree, bad fruit. How to make the tree a good tree? A successful Catholic family is one from which the good God can draw forth holy vocations. It is necessary to often to have this thought in mind, and this from the early years until the maturity of the souls entrusted to you.
One must sanctify oneself, as well as one’s spouse, by means of life in common and by the reception of the sacraments. Sanctity is expected of each and everyone. More so for those who have others to depend on them. “Be perfect as My heavenly Father is perfect.” St. Peter writes “be as children in obedience trust in grace for it is written: “You shall be holy, for I am holy”. In order to be holy and bring others to holiness, it is necessary to practice well the duty of state.
According to the will of God, the father possesses the authority in the family and therefore has the entire responsibility before God and man for his family. This is by nature as Adam is the father of humanity. To share in the paternity of God, to produce souls in the image and likeness of God destined to be with Him in heaven for eternity. There are many beautiful examples of what it is to be a man, to be a husband, to be a father in Sacred Scripture but especially in St. Joseph and Our Lord Jesus Christ. We might ask yes of course St. Joseph but why Our Lord? It is He because He is a perfect Son, a perfect reflection of the Father in Heaven. He is the ideal. One might say that the world hates fatherhood because it is an image of God and His Fatherhood for all.
Wherever there is authority there are duties and responsibilities. The Role of the Father is most important for restoration of Society. With it is linked the Fatherhood of a priesthood. Without good Fathers, there cannot be priests. So in order to reinforce the role of the father in the family, I will propose a few qualities that a father must have and also the disorders that should be noted.
Here are a few qualities that a father must possess.
Benefactor – One who means well to all under his care and who will guide and protect and keep order in the home. He must be most approachable always to assist any with their difficulties.
Accountability - The Father of a family must remember that his authority is delegated to him and that therefore he will one day have to render an account of his management. The father of a family is a steward. The family, father himself, wife, children – all belong to God. The Father has grave responsibility to lead all to Him.
Obedience and Submission to God “The head of all men is Christ” (I Cor. 11:3). Everyone must submit their will to God’s. Most especially the Father as his decisions and actions will affect the entire life of the family for good or bad. How to follow God’s will and His Spirit? It is found with catechism and the sacraments and recourse to the priests. This reference to the Church is willed by God. It can also reassure the wife and the children, and they will know that the decisions are not arbitrary.
Prayer – He must pray for guidance and the holiness of his family. For the souls entrusted to him. What would it be if the souls entrusted to his care are provided for materially only and then lost for eternity. This idea that the father is the one who calls to prayers and takes the initiative in religious ceremonies is even found with the pagans. Prayers, offered together brings order into the home especially if initiated by the father.
Harmony - First and foremost, he must have harmony with God and His Church and secondarily His Wife and children. There is a great importance to live in harmony with his spouse. Without harmony, his efforts will bear little or no fruit. In order to have harmony in the home, it is necessary: to have good communication, unity, admiration, and to be a peacemaker.
For Communication: It is important to speak always to the spouse about projects and the cares of the family. The husband must receive suggestions from and will explain his objectives, bearing always in mind the principle at stake.
In regards to Unity: Mother and Father must share the same spirit in such a way that neither spouse complains against the other especially in front of the children, and that the children thus sense the unity of the parents. Of course, it is up to the husband to make the ultimate decision and to implement the practical means to its realization.
Admiration: The husband must easily praise his wife for her collaboration and good initiatives. By valuing his wife, then, the husband will assure himself of a precious and devoted help. He will leave to his wife a great latitude in the domain that is hers inside the home.
Peacemaker: He must reflect the image of Our Lord. This is why he must handle family conflicts in a calm and just manner. This is a special grace and it even has a special reward – blessed are the peacemakers- for they shall be called children of God. Correction is not an easy task! However, putting order and getting rid of bad habits with kindness and firmness avoids greater conflicts. Cowardice and impatience in corrections make matters far worse. They can be the occasion of coldness, oppositions, and yelling – all sorts of trouble.
Disorders that lead to grave dangers:
The following disorders affect all domains of family life: lack of a schedule, disorder in the house, extended time on phone or internet, a spirit of criticism and of mockery, immodesty in speech, action and dress, dangerous friendships, and idleness.
The father is naturally a leader and must not only pretend to be a good leader but really, he must have qualities and want the good of everyone in the home. He must first lead in prayer, reception of the sacraments, practice of virtue and avoidance of vice. Not only for himself but every member of the family. Nothing can replace a good example of the father. It is necessary that the children see these virtues embodied in the parents in order to practice them in the future.
Let us summarize the qualities of the head of the family which favor obedience from all in family:
Goodness - God the Father is characterized by goodness, a benefactor who will first give good spirit to the family. Such is the primary quality of the head of a family. Goodness allows for those members of the family to open up. Goodness and kindness are not signs of weakness, but of understanding and care for the good of each.
Prudence - The father of a family will regularly practice the virtue of prudence. This virtue consists in looking for good solutions but with mother as well.
Sacrifice A father must sacrifice his selfishness, his comfort zone, and his own interests for his wife and family. “Husbands, love your spouses as Christ also loved the Church” (Eph. 5:25). We know how much Christ loved the Church, to the point of sacrificing Himself for her, even to allowing His Sacred Heart to be pierced.
The father must sacrifice himself. Not pretend. But be the good man expected. The father will take care to remain worthy of the respect of his wife so that she will be proud of him. His work and accomplishments, his attitudes, and of his qualities.
The father must kind and firm. The child must sense that his father loves him and that he does not just favor the child’s wants but truly desires his good. The father must be vigilant and always available for mother and the children.
Let us take a look at the consequences of the faults of the father of the family.
Harshness - If the father is harsh and rough in his authority, not knowing when to listen to his spouse or to his children, he will instill a spirit of questioning and of rebellion. This will cultivate much doubt and distrust in the home. This spirit can destroy the home and lead the loss of faith in the children.
Weakness - If the father is on the other hand, weak making no demands and fleeing responsibility. The wife will attempt to supplement but it will always be lacking. The mother by nature cannot fulfill the role of the father. More often than not if the father shirks responsibility, the sons will lack character, strength of soul, and a sense of responsibility.
Lack of Organization - If the father does not know how to organize, to command precisely, he will always be unhappy because nothing will get done, or what is done will not be done well.
Scandal – Kills the spiritual life of the family. He will lead the souls entrusted to his care to perdition.
Let us look to the ruler in the Gospel. Perform what is expected. Be the one to put things in orders. In all difficulties, trials and struggles have the same reaction as the ruler. Make contact with Christ. You find Christ here. Confess your faith, worship Him, gain His friendship through the sacrament of confession and then bring Him into the Home. You do this by receiving Him in Holy Communion. He will live inside and guide your actions. By doing this it is as if bringing Christ to those members of the family that is sick or dead spiritually. By allowing Him to live in you, then your will becomes his, your actions become his. What is the first thing that our Lord does, “Leave”. These people ridiculed Our Lord. He banishes the worldly spirit, included are all the bad influences and then He touches the child and the home is restored. Our Lord comes to put order, peace, harmony and happiness in the home.